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The wedding ring
A man went to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis.
According to the Nurse attending, the patient's girl friend found the ring in his pants pocket and she got so mad at him, she used petroleum jelly to slip the ring on his penis while he was asleep.
I don't know what's worse:
1) having your girl friend find out you're married.
2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis.
Or..
3) Finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring.
Don't answer wrong! Two Tough Questions
Question 1:
If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion?
Read the next question before looking at the answer for this one.
Question 2:
It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts. Here are the facts about the three candidates.
Candidate A - Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologists. He's had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.
Candidate B - He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps untilnoon , used opium in college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.
Candidate C - He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an occasional beer and never cheated on his wife.
Which of these candidates would be your choice?
________________________________________________________________
Answer to Question No. 1
If your answer to the abortion question is "yes" ...... you just killed Beethoven, the great musician.
Answer to Question No. 2
Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.
Candidate B is Winston Churchill
Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.
Pretty interesting, isn't it?
Makes a person think before judging someone !!!!